what we know

wash our hands clean once again

so they'll blend in

watch the direction of all the pointing fingers

and yet we still see it in our reflection

we submit to all the green, all the envy

and let it take the best part of what we could be

we bleed under our sleeve of all that we feel

and leave behind what we know is real

what we know is real

...

this hourglass of tricksand

continues to fall

it slips through our hands

and leaves nothing at all

as jokes and time fly over our heads

we restlessly lay awake in our beds

in the beds we've made

we submit to all the green, all the envy

and let it take the best part of what we could be

we bleed under our sleeve of all that we feel

and leave behind what we know is real

what we know is real

when the ground shakes

we think we stand still

unable to make

sense until

until we let ourselves fall....

we submit to the greed

we submit to conceit

bleed under our sleeve

and leave behind

what we know is real...

what we know is

real

Always,

Lainey

©2011 all rights reserved.

modern life

There's an old wooden table

dated by the rings left by glasses

fake orchids add the perfect touch

for these conversations through the cable

we talk for hours with our hands

through letters on a modern screen

our emotions have been replaced just so

someone else can understand

we're so close but so far away

separated by square inches of a room

since when did we become so consumed

in these artifical friends everyday?

and who's to say that i'm immune

as I put my thoughts in cyberspace?

and who's to say that you aren't too

when these words have got to you this way?

we're subjected to the art of reason

but we fail to question anything that contradicts

yet we're living hypocritics

when we follow what's popular to believe in

history is made when we stand up for change

or do we give in to these devices?

maybe together both worlds are paradise

if we all knew how to use it the right way

as i stare off the screen and back to the room

my flowers are still in bloom

everything is still in it's place

as we're creating these cyber tombs

Always, Lainey

©2011 all rights reserved.

painted skies

It's getting colder now

and the skies are turning gray

it's all painted in the clouds

like our dreams in other shades

time tells us nothing

if we've stood in one place

age tells us nothing

if there was nothing for us to chase

so let me bring you far away

far away from the most distant memory

let me bring you far away

where life isn't just a dream

wake up to a new embrace

with a new set of eyes

and a permanent smile on your face

no longer painted on for disguise

waste nothing but the unnecessary

cause there's value in it all

don't let it go sedentary

or they'll hide behind your wall

use the best of you in all you do

even when the weather wears you down

show the world they've underestimated you

and wear your true self's crown

it's getting colder now

and the skies are beginning to dawn

it's all painted in the clouds

so now go above and beyond

Always, Lainey

©2011 all rights reserved.

Build

one night

it was dark

the only light inside was for saving

held on

for dear life

and imagined a safe haven

my hands

helped me crawl

as all the walls were caving in

but through the dust that rose

i began to close but i didn't know, didn't know

as i tip toed through broken cement

i saw your silhouette

cause you guided me to you

pushed back debris

watched me climb

as the stones came loose

so i tried and i climbed

and i climbed and i tried

til i knew

i knew

through time

lots of patience

and sleepless nights

i could hear

silence resonate

from the corners of my brain

 so i began to close but i didn't know, didn't know

as i tip toed through broken cement

i saw your silhouette

cause you guided me to you

pushed back debris

watched me climb

as the stones came loose

so i tried and i climbed

and i climbed and i tried

til i knew

i knew

i knew something had to change

and everytime you said my name

i knew i wasn't alone

you made me so much better

and i feel it everytime we're together

cause you guided me to you

pushed back debris

watched me climb

as the stones came loose

so i tried and i climbed

and i climbed and i tried

til i knew

i knew

one night

it was dark

the only light inside was for you

and now

i built a brand new place

somewhere i can stay with you

Always, Lainey

©2011 all rights reserved.

the truth

paper thin an airplane flew

over a tower of cards

toppling over after the wind blew

and behind the glass of this home

i sensed it coming from afar

came all this way just to throw some stones

calendars later it was time

when it was only saved in a photo

so i let it go and it was gone from my mind

i didn't run but i left

wouldn't forget but went with the rising sun

didn't look back, looked ahead

and instead of feeling free

 i still hear you're chasing me

i hear footsteps coming closer together

giving me anxiety

i almost forgot how you were clever

never in a million years

did i think

you would be stuck in those years

wear your pride like a trophy

 so undercover

when we all know what you're secretly hoping

i didn't run but i left

wouldn't forget but went with the rising sun

didn't look back, looked ahead

and instead of feeling free

 i still hear you're chasing me

get your army of ignorance to speak up

repeating things like a parrot on your shoulder

the more crackers you feed the more you get bolder

as the lies grew so did your head

fed your ego with every word you said

when there's a side to you that they'll never know

i hope they'll never know

i didn't run but i left

wouldn't forget but went with the rising sun

didn't look back, looked ahead

and instead of feeling free

 i still hear you're chasing me

i didn't run but i left

wouldn't forget but went with the rising sun

didn't look back, looked ahead

and instead of feeling free

 i still hear you're chasing me

i'm sorry

i'm sorry you've become so good at story telling

you really do believe it

i don't know what else to do

when ignoring it and taking the hits

still didn't stop you

so i give you permission to do what you have to do

cause at least I know the truth

Always, Lainey

©2011 all rights reserved.



My LOVE, Chris

I LOVE that he is the same size as me when he's on his knees.

I LOVE that my foot is the same size as his hand.

I LOVE that two of my footsteps are one of his. It's true, we counted. ;)

I LOVE looking in his eyes and speaking to him with mine.

I LOVE that he cares what I think.

I LOVE that he has a mind of his own.

I LOVE that we trust each other.

I LOVE that we communicate.

I LOVE how hard-working he is.

I LOVE his sense of humor.

I LOVE making him laugh.

I LOVE how he is such a gentleman.

I LOVE how he's always there for me. 

I LOVE how reliable and dependable he is.

I LOVE that I can tell him anything.  He doesn't judge me.

I LOVE how he makes sure I eat breakfast.  I'm not a breakfast person.

I LOVE how he likes to sleep on the side by the door to protect me.

I LOVE how patient he is.

I LOVE his thought process.

I LOVE his style.

I LOVE singing in the car with him and listening to songs on repeat.

I LOVE that he lights candles for me when I get there.

I LOVE the way he smells... & he wears my favorite cologne.

I LOVE his family.

I LOVE how he LOVES my family and friends.

I LOVE how he looks at me... he catches me every time I fall.

I LOVE looking at him. oooh la la...

I LOVE how he's a romantic even though he doesn't admit it much.

I LOVE his resilience.

I LOVE how strong he is.

I LOVE that he can pick me up with one hand.

I LOVE how he talks to me when he's upset.

I LOVE how willing he is to do things spontaneously.

I LOVE kissing him.

I LOVE how he sweeps me off my feet.  I try to do the same ;)

I LOVE who I am when I'm with him.

I LOVE how much we learn from each other.

I LOVE how independent he is.

I LOVE how accepting he is.

I LOVE how big his heart is.

I LOVE how I get goosebumps every time he holds me.

I LOVE how smart and open-minded he is.

I LOVE his sense of morals, ethics, and values.

I LOVE how he "tries" to pay for everything.  Even though I won't let him.

I LOVE that where ever I go with him, we're in paradise. Even if it's at home.

I LOVE how he tries to understand me even when I don't understand myself.

I LOVE that's he's not corrupted by California just yet. ;)

I LOVE how is accent slips out sometimes.

I LOVE when he plays with my hair.

I LOVE how he gets that we both need time with our friends.

I LOVE that he is a good planner.

I LOVE his sense of adventure.

I LOVE the things we don't have in common cause they say a lot about him.

I LOVE how he doesn't mean to choose the lamest movies to watch.

I LOVE they way he cooks and cleans.

I LOVE how much he LOVES Bruce. I LOVE Bruce too!

I LOVE the way he LOVES me.

I just LOVE him.

Always, Lainey 

©2011 all rights reserved.

Map of the World

Look down at my feet, so sedentary

Leading up to me are just my lonely steps

Of the times I can’t forget what led me here

But the time is near

With the map of the world ahead of me

I ask countless questions that remain unanswered

But the silence feeds my curiosity

Internally no one speaks but me so I

Don’t have to divide

Possibilities and I can also be a dancer

Tip toe across the world

I’m so at home , this is the place I know

The map of the world

Slows the world down, and now

I fall asleep to its melancholy sound

There’s no other way to be free

Switch off the bias radio and television

Hate to admit it was my best decision and

Broke free of the mold of man

Finally able to breathe an air so clean

Always, Lainey

©2011 all rights reserved.